Building Confidence in the Saddle

Sanctuary horse, Rebel, and her three-year-old colt, Arrow

This past week, we had somebody at the ranch who has been helping with some construction projects. As he was discussing plans with my partner, they were watching as I was trying to catch a client horse that… didn’t want to be caught. He said to my partner, “That’s A LOT of power to harness, I don’t know how people do it.” And he was right. Horses are big animals, and they can be scary. While they’re pretty much just like big dogs, one wrong move can change the entire course of your life. Despite this knowledge, we still continue to ride and be around these magnificent animals. So what are some ways that we can build our confidence in the saddle and overcome fear?

Horses heartbeats sync with the ones around them. This is a survival strategy in the wild, as if one horse’s heart starts racing, they’ll all start racing and can get to safety if a threat arises. Meaning, if you’re nervous or anxious - the horse can feel it. Some horses might feel your fear and recognize that there’s nothing actually to be afraid of. Other horses feel it, and will act on it. This is why it’s super important to know how to work through your emotions, and have confidence when working with your horse.

Knowing how to properly manage your emotions is crucial. Oftentimes you’ll hear trainers or instructors tell you to leave your emotions at the gate - but unfortunately it doesn’t always work this way. Emotions can’t always be controlled. If a loved one dies, you’re gonna be sad. If you got a promotion at work, you’re gonna be happy. Suppressing your emotions will only work for so long, as eventually they will “boil over” and you’ll have to face them. This is where it’s important to understand why you’re feeling the way you are and learn to redirect and/or reframe your emotions.

Where is your fear coming from? Have you had prior accidents? Seen something that you can’t stop thinking about? Trying something new and worried you’ll fail? Once you can pinpoint where your fear is coming from, you can start trying to reframe your thinking. For example, instead of thinking to yourself “I don’t want to fall off and get hurt again,” change your mindset to “Today is a different day, just because I fell off yesterday doesn’t mean I’ll fall off today.” Or tell yourself, “Nobody’s perfect, I’m not going to get this right on the first try,” rather than “I wonder if people will think I’m incompetent because I can’t ride as well as they can.” You can’t control your emotions, but you can control your mindset.

When you notice yourself getting worked up, you can also try to redirect your emotions. Think of something funny or picture yourself fishing at the lake. Shift your focus from whatever is making you anxious to something that provides you with a sense of peace.

Don’t hesitate to start with something easy and work your way up to something more complex either. If all you’re mentally capable of doing is pulling your horse out and grooming them, then do that for a little bit. If you feel more comfortable sitting on your horse for an hour while they stand tied, that’s ok too. You can’t build your confidence overnight, and the best way to get in the saddle and start working towards your goals is to do it. Check in with yourself regularly and remember it’s ok to call it a day and try again later if you or the horse is getting too stressed.

People are going to say all kinds of things and offer opinions where it’s not needed. You are exactly where you need to be in life - don’t let people discourage you because they think you should be doing xyz when you’re not ready yet. You need to work at the pace that is beneficial for you and your horse, so if people try to talk down on you just ignore them. Don’t compare yourself to others either, because everyone is on their own journey. Just because your friend already has ten rides on her colt doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong if you haven’t even done the first ride. Every horse is different and progresses at a different rate. Comparison is the enemy of results. Keep your head down and focus on what you’re doing if you want to achieve your goals.

No matter how much experience you have - you can always learn something. Even myself, a horse trainer whose sole income is running my business, still am eager for knowledge. I read books and articles, ask for advice, take lessons, and jump on any opportunity I can to learn more. One of the best ways to gain confidence is to seek the help of someone with more experience than you. They can offer advice, teach you how to work through situations, and be hype you up when needed. The only bad question is one that isn’t asked, so never be afraid to ask for help.

And finally, if you’re anything like me, then you might be your own worst critic. Confidence in the saddle starts with you. You have to learn how to get out of your own head, build yourself up rather than tear yourself down, and remember that you probably know more than you give yourself credit for. Take things one day at a time, you’ll find your confidence eventually.